I'm really rather bad at blogging, I think.
I mean, lets face it, a large portion of people blog on a daily basis because they think that people need to hear their thoughts. That's the point of having Facebook and Twitter, right? You want people to know what's on your mind. So, I think my blogging skills suck because, seriously, some days I have way too many thoughts that probably aren't important enough to be shared with the world. I'm doubtful that people would find my ruminations on the lack of focus we as a society have on accomplishing things through hard work, would be that fun to hear. Or, me waxing philosophical on the effects of an overly digitized culture on the future of social skills when being in person with others. That stuff is, quite frankly, wordy and boring. I mean, we have networks dedicated to pundits decrying most of that stuff. Thus, I'd bore (or insult) with consistent blogging, either here or through "social networking."
Still, there are times I just feel like sharing an idea and seeing if it sparks thought with those who may possibly stop by and read what I do on this lowly little page of mine.
The end of the year always brings a stir of emotions in anyone willing to take a second and reflect. We're funny that way, us human beings. We go and live for the moments (or play the role of shrinking violets) and then look back and gaze over things we've done with our time, assessing the importance, stupidity, or relevance of the acts we've allowed ourselves to do over 365 days. Its a funny thing, if you think about it. Some people don't often think of what they've done or are doing. They simply do and do and do until they come to some sort of trans formative moment in their minds. Reflection, it seems, is an inevitability for the humankind. Sometimes it takes a few seconds, other times years and years.
I find that my reflection usually gives me the chance to see what amazing things I've been blessed to experience, whether negative or positive. My perspective, of course, is defined by what I believe though. For me its all about having the opportunity to do things and meet people and grow from that. I tend to think that there are people out there who basically have the same similar experiences throughout a year and come to similar understandings because of that. If that were my life, I'd feel as though it were missing something. I know some like stability and things that are often always the same as that which they understand or call "normal." For whatever reason God has had for it, my life just isn't that way. From year to year, yes, there are a few things which hold true, things like family, my faith, and stuff like that but, I always experience growth and changes that I couldn't possibly have called a year in advance. My life goes through highs and lows and difficulties and victories. Its sour and its sweet and the moments last forever, or pass by so swiftly. My "norm" and my "stability" come from the constant possibility that everything can and will change on me at a moments notice. It has happened to me quite a bit this year, seemingly out-of-the-blue in surprising places, even. But what that does for me is makes me so greatly appreciate the moments as they come and I try my best to absorb as much of them as my meager human mind can muster.
But, the point of this blog isn't really about me at all. Its not even really about the idea of what reflection does or how we use it.
I named this one "Hope Full" on account of what thinking back over 2010 could mean to a person as we embark on another year that I'm sure will be full of challenges and rewards, joys and heartbreaks, surprises and the very expected, and a variety of occasions to make or break ourselves into whatever you desire of yourself. Its Hope Full because until the moment is defined and passed you, there's a possibility for every single day, hour, minute, or second, to bring a different story than that which we've experienced here in 2010. 2011 is potential. Its untapped existence that faces us with every confident or hesitant step forward.
And to me...that's a hope that I find full and enticing. Regardless of whether a huge portion of "me" was lost this year, or "reawakened," or "reality checked," or directed toward my purpose...there remains eternally going forward a hope that each moment can be a fuller and more important lesson or experience than any one before it.
I look forward to entering each second and progressing into more failure, heartbreak, victory, art, music, friendship, maturity, depression, deepening of Faith, extending of grace, fear, hope, and whatever else my path in life leads me to.
Hopefully you may take a second to consider it, that way too.
- Conduct Lionhardt